What is the Path to Passion?

Everyone loves a shortcut. It’s in our DNA. Why expend precious energy, effort or time if you don’t have to? Get Rich in 10 days, Lose 12 Pounds in a Week, Just Two Weeks to a Better Love Life are but a few examples.

Some shortcuts work well. Who doesn’t love a moisturizer that also has sunscreen in it? But some shortcuts—especially the ones that distance us from an experience and other people—can leave us feeling shortchanged.

There is no substitute for hard work. Research underscores the virtue of skipping the short cut and opting for the long cut instead. In a study of entrepreneurs, those who said they put in a great deal of effort into their budding business in the past week were more excited about their work:

The previous week’s effort influenced this week’s effort, such that more effort led to more passion.

The harder they worked, the more passionate they became. This runs counter to what many people believe—that passion is a necessary ingredient for hard work.

More often than not, it is the other way around. The more effort you put into something, the more committed you become.

I notice this with my patients all the time. As one young woman recently remarked:

The moment I started trying at school, I mean really trying not ‘pretend trying,’ my classes became so much more interesting. It makes a difference when I actually do my homework and do the reading. These teachers are actually pretty smart. Who knew?

Passion doesn’t emerge from a vacuum. It takes genuine effort and a great deal of hard work.

Steve Jobs said, “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” I would argue that the only way to love what you do is to do great work.

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman

6 Strategies To Turn A Bad Day Around

It is so easy to start the day on the wrong foot. You spill coffee all over your white shirt, the dog decided to do his business on the new carpet, the milk you already poured in your cereal is spoiled. You know those days—everything seems to be going wrong.

So, what can you do to turn your bad day around?

Here are six strategies to stop that downward spiral in its tracks:

1. Go take a walk

Studies show spending time outdoors puts things in perspective and stops negative thoughts.

2. Do something for someone else

Buy a coffee for the person behind you in line. Send an email to an old friend.

3. Get specific

Figure out what exactly is bugging you. Once you pinpoint the problem it is easier to deal with it.

4. Flip it around

Take five minutes to think about three things that are going well in your life. It can’t all be bad.

5. Set yourself up for small wins

Write down one thing you know you can accomplish today and do it.

6. Mix it up

Instead of stewing at your desk and feeling sorry for yourself, do something different. Bust out of your routine. The moment you take yourself off autopilot, you ground yourself in the present. This helps you stop ruminating about all the bad things that have happened.

Even if you don’t feel like doing any of the above and prefer to wallow in your bad mood, it’s worth doing it to spare those around you. Bad moods are contagious. The good news is good moods are contagious too.

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman

Are You Running on Empty? 4 Signs It’s Time to Recharge

Does panic set in when the battery on your cellphone is low? People go to extraordinary lengths to recharge their battery. Last summer, a Broadway theatregoer was so desperate he climbed onto the stage before the show began to plug his phone into what appeared to be an electrical outlet (it was a fake). He was heckled by the audience and mocked by the stars of the show. Actor Mark Kudisch tweeted:

Dear general audience, an electrical socket that’s a part of the set of the play is NOT for you to charge your iPhone…just an FYI…

I bring this story up because it highlights how hyper-attuned we are to the battery indicator on our devices. Why aren’t we more attuned to our own battery?

When your phone has thirteen percent battery left, I bet you find the nearest outlet ASAP. But when you are running on empty, you just keep going. Most of the time you don’t even realize your battery is running dangerously low.

Here are a few indicators to alert you it is time to recharge:

1. Pay attention to your attention

After a solid stretch of productive work, do you suddenly find yourself compelled to check out the latest sports scores online or pay a visit to the vending machines? Are you having difficulty maintaining the focus and energy you applied to your work a half-hour ago?

2. Take note of your mood

Are you less optimistic about the outcome of your project than you were an hour into it? Has your excitement about tackling a knotty challenge shifted to frustration?

3. Assess your stamina

Do you feel like you’re running out of steam? That you’ve hit a brick wall?

4. Listen to your body

Do you suddenly have heartburn? A headache? What about back pain, dizziness, or a racing pulse?

Take time to recharge your battery so you can live a fully charged life.

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman

A Creative Cure for Distractions

Do you turn to your cellphone whenever you have a moment to spare? You are not alone if waiting for a “Don’t Walk” sign to turn into a “Walk” sign is a trigger to check your device.

Email, Facebook and Instagram are certainly seductive. The problem is how they hijack your brain and steal time away from reflection and focus. Research tells us how important downtime is for learning, memory and creativity. Carving out time for experiences that clear your head is essential.

Spending time in nature is one way to give your brain a break. For urban dwellers who don’t have quick access to trees, visiting an art museum might be just what the doctor ordered.

In Religion for Atheists, Alain de Botton argues how art museums are more than places to look at pretty things. They foster a sense of community, they enhance appreciation of beauty, they expose viewers to different ways of thinking and, last but not least, they provide a sacred space to slow down.

A study in a Swiss art museum tracked brain activity and stress markers (like blood pressure and heart rate) in volunteers. Results indicate viewing art can physically and mentally relieve stress. Related research shows how art stimulates the brain in a way that makes you feel good. Original artworks in a hospital environment are linked with reduction in length of stay, decreased anxiety, reduction in use of some medications and increased staff morale.

Have a spoonful of art and I’ll see you in the morning.

Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.
-Pablo Picasso

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman

(Don’t) Always Live in the Moment

Whether you are on a hot date or in the middle of a yoga session, by all means, do your best to stay in the moment. But if you find yourself in the middle of a heated argument, research suggests the best strategy is to psychologically remove yourself from the present moment and to think about the future instead.

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman

Outbreak: Can You Catch a Bad Mood?

Moods are as easy to catch as the common cold. When you see someone coughing and sneezing with watery eyes, you reflexively move away from them. The same strategy is a good one to follow when faced with people in bad moods.

Studies show how moods are easily passed from one person to another. Psychologists describe this phenomenon as “emotional contagion” and outline a three stage process:

The first stage involves nonconscious mimicry, during which individuals subtly copy one another’s nonverbal cues, including posture, facial expressions and movements. In effect, seeing my frown makes you more likely to frown. People may then experience a feedback stage—because you frowned, you now feel sad. During the final contagion stage, individuals share their experiences until their emotions and behaviors become synchronized.

Consider the mood altering experience of attending a business meeting where the leader is in a great mood or in a bad mood. The tone can run from positive and optimistic to defeatist, stressful and anxiety provoking and chances are your mood will be altered accordingly.

Moods are transmitted to those around you. One of the worst things about a bad day at the office is that it doesn’t stay at the office: when negativity follows you home, it also affects the ones you love.

The good news is that the opposite is true, too. Research suggests that one person’s positive feelings can spread to other members of a household. The study looked at “day-specific self esteem” of working couples and found that if one person came home with a high level of confidence about his or her performance on the job, it was more than likely that by bedtime their partner would also be feeling good about their accomplishments that day.  If one partner generally had low self-esteem and was more prone to having bad days at the office, then the “crossover” of positivity from a partner who had a good day was even more pronounced.

The bottom line: a good mood is catching. Surround yourself with sunspots and don’t get too close to black holes that might suck you in.

I wish you all the best,

Dr. Samantha Boardman